Boundaries Are Self-Respect, Not Selfishness

I’ve always been a people pleaser.
For the longest time, I worried about making others uncomfortable. I worried about what people thought of me, and I often put their needs above my own.

But as I grew older (and hopefully wiser!), I realised something important: not everyone deserves a seat at my table.

Boundaries aren’t selfish—they’re a form of self-respect. And sometimes, that means drawing a clear line when I encounter toxic behaviours like these:

⚠️ Manipulation – guilt-tripping, gaslighting, or playing mind games to stay in control.
🌧️ Constant negativity – draining everyone’s energy by focusing only on the problems.
🚧 Boundary violations – ignoring limits, pushing past your “no,” or trying to control your choices.

Of course, it’s not always easy—especially in the workplace. You can’t just cut people out completely when you still need to collaborate. That’s where I’ve found a few practical strategies that make a big difference:

🛡️ Establish boundaries – set clear limits, step away from gossip, and calmly voice your discomfort when something crosses the line.
🙅 Disengage from negativity – don’t fuel the drama; respond neutrally, redirect the focus, and keep your energy on the work that matters.
🤝 Seek support – find ways to structure your collaboration differently, and don’t hesitate to lean on trusted colleagues or managers when toxicity starts affecting performance.

The real shift for me was this: I stopped thinking of boundaries as walls that keep people out, and started seeing them as guardrails that protect my wellbeing and keep me moving forward.

👉 I’d love to hear from you—what’s one boundary you’ve set that truly changed your life or career?

#Boundaries #SelfGrowth #WorkplaceWellbeing #Leadership #HealthyRelationships